September Is Mine!!!

When september comes, I almost there the end of my age. 19 years old now and I almost open a new beginning for my chapter. I can’t believe all of this, when I still breathing now and god still give me chance to rebuild my life and make it better than before. I never forget this nine”nightmare” years old. I  complete to fix all problem and I felt suffer enough to rebuild my own life that already destroyed by myself. I made a biggest mistake and then I can’t find out the solution but after all of this I’m alive again and reborn to face the other challenge in my life. Honestly I thought when I had a great problem which seem’s an obstacle that I never can to pass it. I guess this gonna be the end of my life. Even I lost my spirit in the darkness way that leads me to my biggest embarassed moment that I will had later, but god helped me and find me the great solution. Thanks god I’m just so blessed and so fortunate to have all of your help and I proud life and death in your gold way. I can open almost every lock and every door and find the way out there, but still I had the problem that never find the way out.  I don’t know really how to say when I’m standing here now in the top of the world and scream a word and express that I’m really happy even without someone special. Great day and great new life is in next step, I almost open the other lock with this key that I have from my life after face all of the problem.  I will open a new great life that will fullfill with happines because i already decide and have my future plan to realize what I want in this world before someone bury my body in the ground.

I will do to the limit and never surrender to realize that. I don’t care what those people out there say about my life. This is me, my life, my business and not yours. The most certain thing that I really want to realize is make my greatest parents proud of me. I will realize it as hard as possible whatever it takes. Because I think I’m a bad boy in this little family, I already made them dissapointed and hopeless because of me. Please god give me more time to life my live in this world. I wish before they close their eyes forever, I will make them smile because of my hard work. I never want to lay down and only imagine my biggest dream and do nothing. When this second past like hours, I even can’t feel my own heart beat. But it’s nothing now, I gonna open new chapter from my life. Twenty years ago when I was born in this world and I raised as a second children in my family. I has been grow up and move to north sumatra and sout sumatra. But now I come back to my homeland after spent eleven years old in the other city. I had a lot of experience and I learned a lot about what’s the meaning of life is. I had a great sadness moment and also happiness moment somewhere out there. I really miss my brother badly, and also my old friend. I miss my crazy habit with them. Hopefully someday I will see them again when I have a wife and a children. Today is the day, I will realize everything inside my mind. No one can hold me. Before I die I wish I will leave some good history in heart of my family, best friend and the other. Just let me know If there’s a space in the heaven. I will take the seat and life forever in the other live. Let’s get it!!!